This week is a new week, I'm done studying for a while now so it's back to focusing on the gym and stretching. I have two new stretching programs to follow for helping me get my splits, and improving my back flexibility, but I'm going to blog about them another day.
Today is more about a change in attitude and my moment of realisation.
Last week I faced the dilemma of having to decide what to wear to dance class. Normally I opt for just my leotard, leggings and a baggy-ish T-shirt as a cover up. It's a contemporary class so we don't have a strict uniform which suits me fine as I can wear what I'm comfortable to wear. The problem last week was the really high temperatures which would have meant I'd have been melting in my usual attire. So what to wear?
I'd spent the day revising in just a pair of shorts and a t-shirt cause it was so warm. Despite feeling comfortable to do that I didn't have the confidence to go to dancing in my shorts. So I changed into a pair of leggings and a top that I normally run in, made from a material designed to keep you cool. It was a sensible option, I did feel cool but a comment at dancing made me realise how stupid I was.
One of the younger girls (she's 14) turned up to class in a pair of shorts but with ballet tights on underneath because she didn't feel comfortable wearing shorts without them. To which one of the older girls (aged 18) replied "you're just coming to dance, you shouldn't care about what you look like, you're going to be a mess by the end anyway"...and I thought to myself, you know what, she's right.
Who'd have cared if I'd turned up at class in a pair of shorts and a T-shirt? Yes I wouldn't have been the slimmest there or the girl with the best pair of legs. But, I'd have been cool and I'd have been able to dance, and that was all that mattered. And that was why we were all there at the end of the day, to dance.
So that was my moment of realisation that my self-confidence had reached such a level that I would rather change into something I was likely to be less-cooler in out of fear of what other people would think of me in something that showed off a bit more flesh. How stupid is that?
Very, is the answer.
Now I'm not saying that since this point my self-confidence is at a level where I'd happily walk out of the house in a bikini and not care what anyone else thought, because I know that's just not going to happen. But I'm definitely not going to let fear of what other people think hold me back from getting to where I want to be in life.
So this week, when I go to the gym I'm not going to think about how I look or what other people think when they see me. I'm going to go and push myself to the absolute limits because otherwise, what's the point in going?
I am going get the body I want, it may take time and I may look amazing while I do it, but I'm doing it and that's what matters.
100 Happy Days...Day 85
Thoughtful presents from family - My Auntie was very kind to give me a huge box cleaning products she'd been buying and saving for me ready for my move in date. It was just little things like sponges, bathroom cleaner, kitchen cleaner etc but it was such a thoughtful gift for her to give. Thank you very much, and Happy Birthday Uncle Ted!
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